If you’re going through high-highs, low-lows, confusion, starvation, self-loathing, vindication, relief, depression, and victory I have a message: love doesn’t feel like this.

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1. Some people put up with a lot of BS in relationships and think they are proving their love and loyalty. But really, they are putting up with BS because they are addicted to the other person, afraid to be alone, or addicted to how they feel as the Saviour, “good one,” or hero/heroine. The shit-taker goes through high-highs, low-lows, confusion, starvation, self-loathing, vindication, relief, depression, and victory. If this is you, I have a message: love doesn’t feel like this.

2. He is smart, has a decent job, has a wonderful family (that loves you), and would make a great dad some day. …


Glitter was literally shooting out of my eye sockets as I quit my PR job to “be my own boss.” Then reality struck.

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Drinking coffee. Or maybe a cup of my own tears.

“A lot of people like to fool you and say that you’re not smart if you never went to college, but common sense rules over everything. That’s what I learned from selling crack.” — Snoop Dogg

My name is Stephanie St.Claire, and I’m an unfunded entrepreneur. I’ve been in business for eight years, after engaging in my own personal and tenuous renaissance (uh…divorce) and rediscovering my Divine Core Purpose. In other words, I grew a pair of ladyballs, launched a business, and tried to make enough money to keep a roof over my head.

But there was a lot to learn, some of which wasn’t covered in Who Moved My Cheese?


No-fail methods that keep me writing, planning creatively, and working my business.

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photo: Unsplash

I’m a personal advisor (a life coach and strategist combined) with my own private practice. I am 100% responsible for all my own marketing and outreach, so I depend on being able to wake up each day and bring powerful, fresh ideas to my work. But sometimes I feel like I’m groping in a fog. This is my go-to list of ideas for when I find my creative light dim and lackluster.

one.
+

Read gorgeous books by favorite authors. Dive into the section of books I’ve gathered in my book cart that will make me a better writer.

two…


He set the gold standard, and it smelled like pumpkin spice muffins

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photo: Today.com

Joe Coulombe, the founder of Trader Joe’s, has died at 89. When I heard the news, I felt the kind of chest-heavy sadness usually reserved for family members.

I grew up in 1970’s Southern California within driving distance of the original Trader Joe’s. My own parents shopped at Stater Brothers and Alpha Beta but I had a friend who had a cool mom. Her cool mom looked like Cher, ate only organic, and had given up smoking.

On Saturday mornings before we hit the beach, we’d pile into the backseat of Cher’s Nova, the hot vinyl seats searing the backs of our legs, and we would drive to Trader Joe’s to fill up the cooler. The store had a nautical theme and it was run by people who were described as “traders on the high seas.” …


From a life coach who’s been there.

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photo: Kinga Cichewicz

There are times when life is just socking you in the face. I’m talking about the days you’re so overcome with anxiety, grief, and stress it’s hard to even think straight.

I have been there, friend. Many, many times. And so I put this list of coping strategies together in hopes it will help you get through the hours, day, night, few days? when things are really, really bad and you are just trying to crawl up to a basic level of emotional stability. We’re not even talking about long-term solutions or self-work. …


Yes, I let myself scroll Instagram in bed.

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image: Rawpixel

This post is inspired by an interview I did with Joseph Mavericks, a purpose and self-improvement writer on Medium. He is publishing a series of interviews with writers about their morning routines.

I’ve experimented with different ways to get the day going and this is what’s working beautifully for me now.

What time do you wake up in the morning?

I wake up at 5:30. I have one of those “sunrise clocks” that mimic the light of sunrise slowly dawning to the sound of birds chirping. It’s a much better way to wake up than my previous two decades of “ENNNTT! EEENNNTTT! …


I taught myself to do this while holding down three jobs and now read 60 books a year.

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photo: Stephanie St.Claire (author)

I’m asked by my subscribers all the time: How on earth do I read one book a week?

When I mention this daily habit, I think people assume I’ve carved out an eccentric little LiFesTyLe of LeiSuRE that includes 4 hour work weeks and daily lunch on the terrace at Cap Ferrat. I must be reading hours a day, stretched out in an oversized velour hammock strung between two stately Cypress trees overlooking the Mediterranean while the bills somehow take care of themselves.

Reader, this could not be further from the truth.


My work was languishing on a drifting and unlit sea until I spotted a lighthouse in her.

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I have been thinking a lot about the beautiful human lighthouses we have in this world. One of those is seismologist, Dr. Lucy Jones. She has inspired me so much. Watching her showed me the template to follow for my own work … work and expertise that has been languishing on a drifting and unlit sea until I spotted a lighthouse in her.

Did you see her on every news channel after the CA earthquakes? She was poised, super knowledgeable, and no-nonsense. While we’re all bracing ourselves in the doorway, clutching our pets to our chest wondering iS tHis thE BiG onE?!? Dr. …


Let me save you some time and heartache by sharing 7 totally avoidable pitfalls you can sidestep by not. doing. these. things.

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photo: Stephanie St.Claire (author)

Today’s advice applies to any person building a career, but this really applies to any person starting a business of their own.

Let me save you some time and heartache by sharing 7 totally avoidable pitfalls you can sidestep by not. doing. these. things. Because I already did them and learned #allthelessons and cried #allthetears.

MISTAKE #1.

I listened to people who had never built a successful business tell me what to do.

HOW I FELL INTO THIS TRAP:

At the beginning of my business, I turned to friend groups and people at networking events to “flesh out” ideas with. I mistakenly thought that pep talks were what I needed instead of straight-up facts and instructions. Many of these people were my friends who were trying to champion me into following my dreams but had totally different dreams themselves (and knew nothing about online business). …


I let go of everything I ever knew about God, religion, and the church and rebuilt my faith.

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photo: author’s collection

Like many of you, my spiritual journey has been a patchwork of experiences with God, the church, my upbringing, personal self-study, and friendship with other souls on the path.

I have spent most of my life in church and have gotten a lot out of it. Going to church served my spiritual growth and I spent many years serving the body of believers I was going to church with.

At some point, however, the whole process and lifestyle stopped feeding me.

I share in the spirit of encouragement because my love and faith in God have grown steady, deep, and strong over the past 15 years without going to church. …

About

Stephanie St.Claire

Writer. Reader. Lover of the Oxford comma. Writing for Medium since 2013. Find me at stephaniestclaire.com

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